Ann Coulter’s Soccer Flop

Why Coulter Trashed Soccer and What It Reveals About Coulter

Ann Coulter leapt off the cliff with her universally-criticized polemic against soccer. Many questioned why she would write something so absurd about something of which she is so ignorant. Permit me to offer both a rationale for her behavior and insight into what it reveals about Coulter.

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Last week, Coulter again garnered global attention with a laughable column[1] devoted to a sport she neither likes nor understands. Her xenophobic diatribe was absurd, inaccurate, irrational, and dogmatic. (Even conservatives panned it.) Moreover, she politicized a global sport and demeaned its fans.

But this as merely an extension of Coulter’s politicization of the whole of life.

Shoddy Journalism

The Fourth Estate and social media were awash with reports which revealed Coulter’s utter ignorance of the subject of her essay, which was replete with basic factual errors in virtually everything she asserted. (A simple Google search will find many items providing detailed examinations of all of her claims.)

Although Coulter asserted that soccer is a left-wing conspiracy to undermine America, many conservatives rebuked her.[2]

On Townhall (one of Coulter’s primary distribution sites), two conservatives observed:

“We’re guessing Ann’s never watched a soccer game because if she had, she’d realize most of her points are ludicrous. We’re reminded of Nancy Pelosi’s comment about having to pass the bill so we know what’s in it. Ann just simply doesn’t know or understand soccer.”[3]

At the Daily Caller:

“Ann Coulter is, at her best, a provocative and entertaining performance artist. Unfortunately, there are times when her poststructuralist reasoning falls short of insightful analysis. An excellent example of such a time comes from last week, when she dedicated a column to soccer. … And it goes on and on like that, misunderstanding after misunderstanding.”[4]

One Coulter critic asserted that we need Ann Coulter in order to unify against a common enemy, writing, “We need Ann Coulter because the world needs villains to unite everyone.”[5]

Coulter, a villain? Please explain! “Ann Coulter is doing what Ann Coulter does – showing what it means to be the worst humanity has to offer.” This blogger observed what others have in the past:

“If you’re surprised by Ann Coulter’s rage against the World Cup, then shame on you. This type of blind rage and mindless speculation is what has made her career. She is a shameless opportunist who will use whatever is in the news to push her message of hatred, bigotry, and divisiveness. She plays to an audience of rage-machines who love to hate what they don’t understand.”

Criticisms of Coulter’s column populated the social media. Here are a few samplings from the Fairfield Daily Voice:[6]

  • “Ann Coulter meets a new low. I have no words. Probably the worst column I’ve read. And I don’t even like soccer,” Alexander Hallberg said via @wingate32
  • “The biggest fail of Ann Coulter’s presumably mock-Xenophobic and tongue-in-cheek-ignorant anti-soccer rant is that it wasn’t actually funny,” Jim Piddock ‏said via @realjimpiddock  .
  • “Hate to give it more attention because that was the whole purpose of the article, but Ann Coulter’s piece on soccer was truly truly awful,” Alex Eaton ‏said @EatonGood.
  • Alex Kantrowitz ‏@Kantrowitz  called it “Ann Coulter self-parody.”
  • “Hilarious anti-soccer anti-immigration op-ed from @AnnCoulter that reads like an Onion piece,” Kris Nielsen ‏said @KrisNielsenKC.

Conservatives United

One of Coulter’s fellow Floridians, Frank Cerabino of the Palm Beach Post, offered six reasons why conservatives should love soccer:[7]

1. Soccer rewards top performers

2. Soccer punishes failure

3. Soccer is anti-regulatory

4. Soccer is not litigious

5. Soccer celebrates the corporation

6. Soccer prizes a strong defense

Sampling of Headlines

A sampling of headlines this past week provides a sense of the coverage given Coulter’s column. It should be noted that many critiques of Coulter included conservatives as a whole within those critiques – considering Coulter as representative of all conservatives.

Headlines included:

  • “How Ann Coulter Lost Her Mind Over World Cup Soccer”
  • “Americans enjoying the World Cup is driving Ann Coulter crazy”
  • “Romneycare Supporter Ann Coulter is 100% Wrong About Soccer”
  • “Ann Coulter is not so much wrong as stupid about Soccer”
  • “The Only Response To Ann Coulter’s Completely Idiotic Comments About Soccer And America”
  • “Ann Coulter’s Rant Against Soccer Is Her Craziest Yet”
  • “5 Reasons Ann Coulter’s Anti-Soccer Rant Is Brilliant”
  • “Some people will use any reason to be angry or to keep us angry at each other – even soccer”
  • “Ann Coulter calls soccer a liberal conspiracy”
  • “Is Anne Coulter writing for The Onion these days?”
  • “Ann Coulter’s World Cup jaw-dropper”
  • “Ann Coulter’s ridiculous World Cup claims underline conservatives’ growing anxiety about our hyper-connected world”
  • “Ann Coulter Slammed by Conservatives for Dissing Soccer”
  • “Ann Coulter, the World Cup, and the Right’s Extreme Xenophobia”
  • “’Soccer Operative’ Ann Coulter Should Stick to Bashing Liberals”
  • “Ann Coulter’s Anti-World Cup Rant Is Stuck on American Exceptionalism”

Another Miley Cyrus Moment?

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Coulter’s continual use of the shock factor prompted conservative author Bernard Goldberg to write, “Ann Coulter is the Miley Cyrus of political commentary.”[8] Goldberg even suggested that Ann’s next book should be a memoir entitled, How I Desperately Tried to Stay Relevant by Becoming Miley.

Ironically, Coulter’s increasingly desperate attempts to remain relevant further erode any credibility she may still have, thus making her even more irrelevant.

Coulter has taken a (soccer) wrecking ball to wreak havoc upon her enemy, using shock and awe tactics to promote herself, keeping herself in the limelight. But her very position in the limelight sheds light upon every error (forced or not), every misstep, and every excess that she employs to get all those lights shining on her.[9]

Coulter Doubles Down

Rivaling President Obama’s arrogance, last night Coulter posted a second soccer polemic,[10] doubling down on her depravity.[11] In that piece, Coulter claims vindication, blames her critics for the furor over her words, deflects attention from herself to the New York Times, and uses humor (again, contrary to facts) to attack her foes and defend herself. (Yes, Coulter considers herself a courageous heroine attacked by the very people she purposely offends.)

Why would Coulter make such astonishing – and verifiably false – claims about a sport of which she remains so ignorant? Stand by for Part II.

Resources:

Never Trust Ann Coulter – at ANY Age at www.coulterwatch.com/never.pdf.

Endnotes:

[1]       Ann Coulter, “America’s Favorite National Pastime: Hating Soccer,” 6/25/14.

[2]       Drew MacKenzie, “Ann Coulter Slammed by Conservatives for Dissing Soccer,” Newsmax, 7/1/14, http://www.newsmax.com/US/Ann-Coulter-soccer-World-Cup/2014/07/01/id/580242/.

[3]       Lindsay Boyd and Chris Burger, “’Soccer Operative’ Ann Coulter Should Stick to Bashing Liberals,” Townhall, 7/2/14, http://townhall.com/columnists/lindsayboyd/2014/07/02/soccer-operative-ann-coulter-should-stick-to-bashing-liberals-n1857924/page/full.

[4]       Stan Veuger, “Is Ann Coulter a closet soccer fan?” Daily Caller, 7/1/14, http://www.aei.org/article/economics/is-ann-coulter-a-closet-soccer-fan/?utm_source=web&utm_medium=facebook&utm_campaign=070114.

[5]       Popgun Chaos, “Why we need Ann Coulter,” 6/26/14, http://www.popgunchaos.com/2014/06/26/why-we-need-ann-coulter/.

[6]       “New Canaan Native Ann Coulter Trolls World Cup, Calls Soccer Un-American,” Fairfield Daily Voice, 6/27/14, http://fairfield.dailyvoice.com/politics/new-canaan-native-ann-coulter-trolls-world-cup-calls-soccer-un-american.

[7]       Frank Cerabino, “Six reasons conservatives should love soccer, despite what Ann Coulter says,” Myrtle Beach Online, 7/2/14, http://www.myrtlebeachonline.com/2014/07/02/4331368/op-ed-six-reasons-conservatives.html.

[8]       Bernard Goldberg, “How Ann Coulter Became Miley Cyrus,” 9/30/13, http://www.bernardgoldberg.com/how-ann-coulter-became-miley-cyrus/.

[9]       Coulter is used to, comfortable with, and feels entitled to being in the spotlight. She thrives on the attention – and she will do anything she can to get it. See David Daley, “Ann Coulter: light’s all shining on her,” Hartford Courant, 6/25/99.

[10]     Ann Coulter, “Soccer: Part Deux,” 7/2/14.

[11]     Depravity? Yes! Deliberately lying and willfully defaming whole groups of innocent people for the purpose of offending them – and garnering attention for oneself – is depraved.

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