Monthly Archives: August 2016

Coulter’s Unrequited Love

Ann Coulter’s latest, deepest, and most sorrowful love is Donald Trump.

Coulter’s Unrequited Love

As reported in The Times (emphasis added):

“At present, though, as near as I can tell, the great love of her life is Donald Trump. ‘I’ve been doing nothing but watching Trump on TV,’ she says. ‘I wish there was a Trump channel where you could just watch him 24 hours a day. I’d never sleep.’”

Seriously? Believe it.

When she was asked to describe her actual relationship with Trump, Coulter replied, “Blind worship.”[1] Coulter amplified her answer, “It’s a little like the North Korean people with their dear, dear leader.”

Coulter eagerly admits that she would actually like to marry him! Yes, marry! “I totally would [marry Trump if he were single].”

What is it that sets Ann’s heart all aflutter? Well, it all began with “that Mexican rapist speech [that] won my heart forever.” Huh? Again, “He won my heart with that Mexican rapist speech. That won me over.”[2]

OK.

Coulter’s Trump love is really self-love. Coulter said, “I also think he’s like the alpha male doppelganger of me.” Perhaps looking in the mirror, Coulter exclaimed, “Donald Trump, I love him because he does talk a little like me, which is to say, blunt.”[3]

For about a year, Coulter has called Trump “the greatest candidate for president ever”[4] and “the candidate I’ve been dreaming of.”[5]

Hers is a self-sacrificial love, according to The Times:

“For his sake, she says, she has been prepared to wreck her career. While he campaigned in the primaries, she followed him from state to state, appearing on local talk radio shows. She met with Trump and told him: ‘I’m the only one losing money trying to get you in the White House, you’re going to listen to me.’”

Well, maybe more demanding than self-sacrificial. Trump must toe her line. After Trump’s immigration flip-flop, a piqued Coulter joked, “He just said something stupid, which he’s done before, and he will do again … he does need a little slap now and then.” And Coulter is happy to do the slapping. (Sounds more like a nagging girlfriend than true love to me.)

In what could be termed a lovers’ spat, on the very day of Coulter’s book launch, Trump sabotaged her paean to him by betraying the central premise of her book and its raison d’etre. Trump flip-flopped on immigration.

Coulter-Trump Headlines

Did Trump pick that particular moment in time due to political expediency or to reverse his abysmal poll numbers? Or was it, perhaps, something more personal – a battle between two unyielding narcissists.

Ego vs. ego. Narcissist vs. narcissist.

Perhaps it was months of Coulter taking credit for Trump’s policies. As reported by Breitbart News, “Coulter’s last book, Adios, America, provided a blueprint of sorts for Trump’s campaign.”

Perhaps Trump bristles at the thought of Coulter being called “Trump’s Brain.”

Perhaps it was the Times headline: “The woman who tells Donald Trump what to think.”

I'm in charge

In July 2015, acting like a petulant, jilted lover, Coulter grumbled, “Yes [Trump got an advance copy of Adios, America!], I’ve been broadcasting it like mad. I don’t know why he won’t admit it. … I’ve detailed everything he’s saying. He gives the campaign speeches on it. My book is the footnotes.”[6]

Now, over one year later, Trump truly jilted Coulter. (Trump hasn’t even read Coulter’s book-length love letter to him.)

Ann does not take rejection well.

Endnotes:

[1]               Ann Coulter, Alan Colmes Show, Fox News, 1/15/16.

[2]               Ann Coulter, Opie & Jimmy Show, 8/22/16.

[3]               Ann Coulter, Federalist Radio, 6/17/15.

[4]               Ann Coulter, Joyce Kaufman Show, WFTL, 12/17/15.

[5]               Ann Coulter, Sean Hannity Show, Premiere Radio Networks, 1/19/16.

[6]               Ann Coulter, Drive at Five, WMAL, 7/7/15.

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Ann Coulter Roasted

Polemicist Ann Coulter was roasted at Comedy Central’s Roast of Rob Lowe (see graphic).

Ann Coulter Roasted

Some of the jokes aimed at Coulter were vicious and vile, expressing the enmity she has evoked across the nation. (She has been called the most hated woman in America, after all.)

Coulter responded: “As a right-wing hate-monger, it is fantastic to be at a big Hollywood shindig with all these glittering celebrities that isn’t a fundraiser for Obama. There is nothing you can tell me to discourage me. My whole career has been an Ann Coulter roast.”

While Coulter has not lost her edge, she has lost her relevancy. More and more frequently, conservatives have come out against Coulter.

Since 9/11, many conservatives have frequently found fault with the substance and style of Coulter’s work, as well as with her integrity and veracity. In fact, conservative criticism of Coulter has increased dramatically in recent years.

Her current book, In Trump We Trust, has been completely undermined by her subject and savior, Donald Trump himself, prompting a slew of parody book covers. Coulter actually exhibited the five stages of grief in less than 36 hours.

Coulter has become an expert at one thing: turning herself into a parody.

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Five Stages of Coulter’s Trump Grief

Donald Trump sabotaged Ann Coulter’s paean to him by betraying the central premise of her book and its raison d’etre.

Alex Griswold at Mediaite observed that in less than 36 hours, Coulter exhibited the five stages of grief.

Coulter’s Five Stages of Trump Grief

Coulter's Five Stages of Grief

Alternative Ann Coulter Book Covers

Few people are as worthy of mocking as Ann Coulter. Add to that her latest book worshipful of the eminently mock-worthy celebrity Donald Trump and you have a recipe for delight.

Alternative Ann Coulter Book Covers

Posted here are a few parodies of Coulter’s book cover for your amusement. Unless otherwise noted, they were obtained on the Internet.

You are welcome to add your own to this collection.

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Trump Hasn’t Read Coulter’s Trump-Worshiping Book

Donald Trump hasn’t read Ann Coulter’s book about him.

Trump Hasn’t Read Coulter’s Trump-Worshiping Book

A book worshipful in tone and glorifying in substance.

A book written by one narcissist to another narcissist.

A book written by his former consigliere who is known affectionately as Trump’s Brain.

And Trump hasn’t read it.

While many Americans seek to #DumpTrump, perhaps this is the beginning of a #TrumpDump.

Coulter is not pleased.

Fascinating Book

Coulter’s ISIS Denial

Are you worried about an attack from ISIS in America? I’m not.”

Coulter’s ISIS Denial

Ann Coulter spoke those words on August 22, 2016.[1] Long after San Bernardino and Orlando. Long after Paris, Brussels, Istanbul, and Nice.

According to FBI counterterrorism expert Dr. Sebastian Gorka, there have been 109 ISIS attacks in America in the last two years.[2]

Moreover, Coulter argues that domestic terrorist attacks by ISIS are “an immigration problem.”

Coulter has repeatedly denied (again,[3] and again,[4] and again,[5] and again,[6] and again,[7] and again,[8] and again,[9] and again[10]) the threat that ISIS poses to Americans in America.

Here are a few Coulter gems: “I don’t even care about ISIS!” “ISIS is not at our doorstep.” “Forget the terrorism.”

Forgetting the terrorism, Coulter blithely charges ahead with her anti-immigration agenda and rejects every effort to deal with those terrorists and would-be terrorists who are already here!

If Coulter’s entire immigration plan was put into effect, it would not prevent terrorist attacks from jihadists or radicalized Americans who are already here.

A moratorium on all immigration – which is her favorite proposal – would do absolutely nothing to address the jihadist threat currently entrenched in America. Under Coulter’s plan, American citizens who have lived in America for decades and been radicalized to jihad would remain in America.

As for the 9/11 hijackers, guess how many were immigrants? None! One entered the U.S. on a student visa, the remainder on tourist or business visas.

Emulating Obama, who dismisses the ISIS threat and refuses to even name Islamic terrorism, Coulter dismisses the ISIS threat and refuses to acknowledge its existence in the heartland of America.

Ludicrously, Coulter writes: “If your elected representative is talking to you about ISIS, he’s planning to outsource your job and move Syrian refugees into your neighborhood.”

Coulter is acting as a Quisling isolationist.

Wake up, Ann Coulter!

Endnotes:

[1]               Ann Coulter, Opie & Jimmy Show, Sirius XM, 8/22/16.

[2]               Dr. Sebastian Gorka, Drive at Five, WMAL, 8/23/16.

[3]               See “Coulter Denies Islamist Threat” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-69.

[4]               See “Adios, Ann: Fear Mexicans, Not Jihadists” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-6A.

[5]               See “Ann Coulter … Dangerously Wrong!” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-7x.

[6]               See “Coulter Flips Out, Again!” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-aH.

[7]               See “Coulter Aghast at ISIS Coverage” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-aK.

[8]               See “Stop Immigrants, Not Terrorists!” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-b2.

[9]               See “Coulter Still Doesn’t Get Terrorist Threat!” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-bg.

[10]             See “Coulter, Orlando, & Nonsense!” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-eL.

Mocking Spastic Retards is OK

Ann Coulter just made a fool of herself.[1] Again.[2]

Mocking Spastic Retards is OK

This time Coulter defended Donald Trump’s mocking of a disabled journalist, using four rather obtuse and irrational arguments: 1) that Trump was doing “full-on spastic retard” (which is perfectly acceptable in her eyes) and not mocking a “journalist with disabilities,” 2) that the disabled journalist deserved to be mocked, 3) what we plainly see on video is not really what we see, and 4) we have been brainwashed into instantly believing everything bad the media says about Trump.

Coulter made these four arguments on the Opie & Jimmy Show (8/22/16).

Mocking Spastic Retards is OK

First, Coulter denied the proof that was literally before her eyes, claiming that Trump’s “spastic retard” performance “was not an exaggeration” of the reporter’s disability. She said, “[Trump] was doing full on retard. That’s not what this guy is. … He’s doing spastic retard.”

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Yes, Coulter’s defense of Trump for mocking a disabled reporter is that he was really just mocking a generic retarded person. Moreover, Coulter insists[3] that calling people retarded and mocking them thusly is perfectly acceptable behavior.[4] Coulter is wont to use the R-word without hesitation.

The Disabled Journalist Deserved Being Mocked

But, Coulter conceded, if Trump were mocking a reporter for his disability, then the reporter deserved it. (Yes, blame the victim, not the victimizer.)

Coulter argued, “He’s not making fun of a guy’s disability but if he were, he deserves it.” Why did the disabled journalist “deserve” to be mocked with a “full-on spastic retard” routine? Because he lied about Trump.

Readers may recall that Coulter also sided with the victimizer and attacked the victim[5] in a well-reported case of physical assault by Trump’s campaign manager, Corey Lewandowski, on reporter Michelle Fields. Coulter went so far as to ridicule Fields by jokingly claiming that she (Coulter) had been gang-raped.[6]

Don’t Believe Your Lying Eyes

Again, while watching he video of Trump’s actions – in slow motion and freeze-framed – Coulter preposterously repeated, “That hand is not bent.”

(Recall the absurdity and audacity of other propagandistic pronouncements: ISIS is on the run, America has never been safer, the border is secure. They demonstrate that propagandists like Coulter[7] have no shame.[8])

George Orwell accurately portrayed how propagandists operate.[9]

Don’t believe your lying eyes! Believe what I tell you that you are seeing! (Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain. Those aren’t the droids you’re looking for.)

Brainwashed by the Media

Having failed to convince her hosts that Trump was not mocking the journalist and that they shouldn’t believe their own eyes, Coulter then blamed the co-hosts for disagreeing with her. (Remember, she first blamed the journalist and then the media and now the co-hosts – for being duped by the media. But, remember, Trump is innocent, innocent, innocent.)

Likening the mainstream media in America to Pravda, Coulter claimed that the American people have become so brainwashed that they immediately succumb to whatever the particular lie of the moment might be. Coulter asserted that the co-hosts had become so brainwashed by media bias that they were incapable of accurately interpreting the very clear video that they were viewing.

Coulter’s message: You can’t think for yourself. Let me tell you what you should believe.

But, since we can’t trust Coulter,[10] why should we trust Trump?

From her book:

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Endnotes:

[1]               See “Ignorant Ideologue” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-br.

[2]               See “Ann Coulter, Bimbo” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-bS.

[3]               See “Coulter, Simply Offensive” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-5i.

[4]               See Chapter 4, “… Brains,” The Beauty of Conservatism, available as a free download at www.coulterwatch.com/beauty.pdf.

[5]               See “Will Ann Coulter Apologize to Michelle Fields?” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-di.

[6]               See “Ann Coulter Was Gang Raped!” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-dp.

[7]               See “Ann Coulter = Leni Riefenstahl” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-5w.

[8]               See “Coulter Proud to be Leni” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-eB.

[9]               See Propaganda: Orwell in the Age of Ann Coulter, available as a free download at www.coulterwatch.com/propaganda.pdf.

[10]             See Never Trust Ann Coulter – at ANY Age, available as a free download at www.coulterwatch.com/never.pdf.