In a stunning develop, political pugilist Donald “The Donald” Trump will pick polemicist Ann “The Shock Jock” Coulter to be his running mate in his bid for Bully-in-Chief[1] of the United States of Trump.
At least one insider was nonplussed over this development, pointing out, “When they look at each other, it’s as if they’re looking into a mirror.”[2] Coulter agrees, saying, “Donald Trump, I love him because he does talk a little like me, which is to say, blunt.”[3] Moreover, “I’ve detailed everything he’s saying. He gives the campaign speeches on it. My book is the footnotes.”[4]
(Yes, Ann Coulter is the Leni Riefenstahl[5] of the Trump campaign’s propaganda[6] machine.)
Like Trump, Coulter forsakes the pro-life movement,[7] looks with disdain on immigrants,[8] and actually pursues non-conservative policies.[9] Oh, and they’re both [10] bullies.[11] Coulter has certainly proven that she’s no better than Trump.[12]
Inquiring minds want to know if love is in the air. Early in Trump’s campaign, Coulter said, “I would like to be the head of Donald Trump’s Homeland Security.” An enraptured Ann later gushed, “I totally would [marry Trump if he were single].”[13] It looks like she may have to settle for vice president.
Denied (at least for now) a real marriage made in heaven, Coulter is presently part of a political one. Coulter declares, “Trump – the greatest candidate for president ever!”[14] Everything The Donald says and does is magnificent in Ann’s eyes. (Love is blind! But, bear in mind that Ann calls Trump her Savior and admits their relationship is one of “blind worship.”)[15]
Referring to Trump’s immigration policy, Coulter tweeted, “The greatest political document since the Magna Carta.” (Yes, Ann skipped over the Declaration of Independence, the Constitution, the Bill of Rights, Washington’s Farewell Address, Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address, Lincoln’s Second Inaugural, etc.)
Coulter’s assessment of Trump’s recent foreign policy speech is equally hyperbolic (ALL CAPS on Twitter!): “GREATEST FOREIGN POLICY SPEECH SINCE WASHINGTON’S FAREWELL ADDRESS.”
Privately, Coulter entertains some doubts. In a brief moment of candor, Ann admitted that Trump is “mental,”[16] but, nonetheless, she still argues, “he’s magnificent now.”[17] (Perhaps they are both mental!)
Coulter has staked her career and what’s left of her tattered reputation[18] on a Trump victory and she has even renamed the GOP “the new Trump Republican Party.”[19] Indeed, Coulter admits, “I hope Donald Trump does destroy the Republican Party and we have a new pro-American Republican Party.”[20]
Even though Ann views herself as the Harriet Beecher Stowe of this New Trump Party,[21] becoming Vice President Coulter would be a splendid prize and honor which would only further increase her vanity.[22] Hubris is surely a trait Ann shares with Donald.[23] They are, after all, the elite of elites.[24]
Ann Coulter played the role of Vice President of the United States in Sharknado 3 and on a Fox News comedy show. Will she become the real thing?[25]
Endnotes:
[1] See “How to Talk to a Bully (if you must)” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-bY.
[2] This is a totally fabricated quote. The remainder of this piece is 100% factual!
[3] Ann Coulter, Federalist Radio, 6/17/15.
[4] See “Coulter Trumped Up” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-7Q.
[5] See “Ann Coulter = Leni Riefenstahl” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-5w.
[6] See Propaganda: Orwell in the Age of Ann Coulter, available as a free download at www.coulterwatch.com/propaganda.pdf.
[7] See “Ann Coulter Still Blind to Abortion” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-9I.
[8] See “Coulter: All Immigrants Are Bad” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-8w.
[9] See “Coulter’s Latest RINO Would Give Democrats Victory” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-8t.
[10] See “Bully Boy Trump” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-cv.
[11] See “Ann Coulter: Wisconsin Sucks” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-ec.
[12] See “No Better Than Trump!” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-dW.
[13] Ann Coulter, Alan Colmes Show, Fox News, 1/15/16.
[14] Ann Coulter, Joyce Kaufman Show, WFTL, 12/17/15.
[15] See “Meet Ann Coulter’s Savior” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-bM.
[16] See “Coulter Goes Mental Over Her ‘Mental’ Candidate” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-d8.
[17] Ann Coulter, Alan Colmes Show, Fox News, 7/10/15.
[18] See “Ann Coulter’s Growing Irrelevancy” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-8Y.
[19] Ann Coulter, Live Book Signing, 12/21/15.
[20] Ann Coulter, Eric Metaxas Show, Salem Media Group, 1/12/16.
[21] See “Coulter’s Know-Nothing American Party” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-bP.
[22] See Vanity: Ann Coulter’s Quest for Glory, available as a free download at http://www.coulterwatch.com/vanity.pdf.
[23] See “Ann Coulter – Smartest Person in the World” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-59.
[24] See “Coulter – An Elite’s Elite” at http://wp.me/p4jHFp-aW.
[25] See Never Trust Ann Coulter – at ANY Age, available as a free download at http://www.coulterwatch.com/never.pdf.
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